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  #1  
Old 16-04-2021, 10:51 AM
Janee Janee is offline
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Divorce of Vietnam Girl

Hi, had something on my heart.

my friend got married to a VN girl about 10 years back. Shotgun wedding, so now the kid is about 10 years old. Good kid, but seems a bit neglected by the mother, and the mother doesn't engage with maintenance of the household.

The VN girl doesn't give a fuck about his family, just living there to earn money and spend on makeup, clothes, surgery etc. Stays out late at night, drinks, making money for her family back home.

And my friend just living on and on, gave up on it.

He doesn't really love her, he just loves the kid. He owns the house (his only asset) and retired. He also has two (much older) kids, who live in the same house, and some other extended family members there too.

Weighing heavily on me bc I'm worried for my friend and the kid as well as his family.

I don't know how to convince my friend he should go for divorce, and what are the consequences and implications on his housing situation etc, how he can win the kid (if the mother decides to use him as a shield etc).

Looking for any bros with previous experience in this... how the courts will treat such a marriage, and how to show my friend this raw deal he's getting.
  #2  
Old 16-04-2021, 11:37 AM
Janee Janee is offline
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Re: Divorce of Vietnam Girl

Quote:
Originally Posted by funboi View Post
1. Find prove of her mixing with other guys.

Accuse her of extra-marital affairs. If can prove she doing "immoral" then during divorce time can shoot her.

=========
2. Find prove of her working illegally or doing illegal work.

She work as freelancer etc. Actually even the new sg law also changed for spouse working permit. Again any "immoral" things she do can shoot her during divorce.

=========
3. Find out the method which she frequently use to send money back vietnam. And any paper trail for copy?

Again if can prove she have income or some kind of financial support esp. from "immoral" activities be good for divorce.

=========
4. Find out who got names as owner in the house.

Best is her name not inside and owner can draw up a WILL if possible. CPF side also can indicate.

=========
5. Find out if she already have PR or Citizenship.

If just PR only is best. If citizenship already then jialat.

=========
6. Find out the kid born sg or viet and have any passport.

No passport is best to avoid flight risk

=========
7. Install CCTV at home to record daily activities.

This can be use as prove she don't do any house work and go out and back late at night or maybe dress like KTV girl. Then show who been taking care the kid daily activities.

Above just personal opinion.
Thanks funboi. This is really helpful and actionable advice.

Now not even PR I think, even though many years trying. LTVP.

Her name not in house. Best to draw up will.

CCTV idea is good.

I will get back to you after chat with my friend and what they think.
  #3  
Old 16-04-2021, 12:47 PM
bignehneh bignehneh is offline
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Re: Divorce of Vietnam Girl

Quote:
Originally Posted by Janee View Post
Hi, had something on my heart.

my friend got married to a VN girl about 10 years back. Shotgun wedding, so now the kid is about 10 years old. Good kid, but seems a bit neglected by the mother, and the mother doesn't engage with maintenance of the household.

The VN girl doesn't give a fuck about his family, just living there to earn money and spend on makeup, clothes, surgery etc. Stays out late at night, drinks, making money for her family back home.

And my friend just living on and on, gave up on it.

He doesn't really love her, he just loves the kid. He owns the house (his only asset) and retired. He also has two (much older) kids, who live in the same house, and some other extended family members there too.

Weighing heavily on me bc I'm worried for my friend and the kid as well as his family.

I don't know how to convince my friend he should go for divorce, and what are the consequences and implications on his housing situation etc, how he can win the kid (if the mother decides to use him as a shield etc).

Looking for any bros with previous experience in this... how the courts will treat such a marriage, and how to show my friend this raw deal he's getting.
You are a damn good friend! Kudos.....
  #4  
Old 16-04-2021, 12:49 PM
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Xgenre Xgenre is offline
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Re: Divorce of Vietnam Girl

Quote:
Originally Posted by Janee View Post
The VN girl doesn't give a fuck about his family, just living there to earn money and spend on makeup, clothes, surgery etc. Stays out late at night, drinks, making money for her family back home.

And my friend just living on and on, gave up on it.

He doesn't really love her, he just loves the kid. He owns the house (his only asset) and retired. He also has two (much older) kids, who live in the same house, and some other extended family members there too.

Weighing heavily on me bc I'm worried for my friend and the kid as well as his family.

I don't know how to convince my friend he should go for divorce, and what are the consequences and implications on his housing situation etc, how he can win the kid (if the mother decides to use him as a shield etc).
Why are you so kaypoh? None of your business. To you, a divorce should happen due to your sense of right and wrong. You are also not living their lives.

If he divorces her, chances are he will lose part of his retirement assets plus provide a monthly alimony to her. Why encourage him to make a financial loss? Not as if he has someone else in his life that he wants to marry. Plus the kid is young. How is being stuck between 2 divorced parents better?

If you have nothing to lose, you shouldn't be talking so much.
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  #5  
Old 16-04-2021, 12:50 PM
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Re: Divorce of Vietnam Girl

Quote:
Originally Posted by funboi View Post
Again, check her employment status. Because new law kicks in. If she not even PR and kana offence maybe can cause revoke of her pass.

e.g. during her stay in sg using LTVP, she work illegally as ML caught during AV raid. Such offence is good for future divorce ingredients.

The CCTV thing must find excuses cuz very obvious. Can use excuse such as win lucky draw? Or upgrade house to become smart home with a few new items to make it less obvious. If occupants of the house already know about it and its placed at common areas then should have less issues. Can also use it to say monitor old people fall down etc esp if house really got old or sick people.

when reporting do make sure u indicared you just found out, cos if you have been knowing for long and only.choose to report now, you will get into trouble too
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  #6  
Old 16-04-2021, 04:31 PM
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Re: Divorce of Vietnam Girl

Quote:
Originally Posted by funboi View Post
Actually there are various possibilities.

1. TS is asking for himself.
2. TS aim his friend viet wife long time liao.
3. TS find his viet wife sian already wana divorce without lose money.
4. TS really care for his friend.
5. TS is gay and love his friend. 5555

Sadly, this could be another tragic vietnam girl drama She could be living a hard life in sg cuz her husband ill-treated her since day 1.
Power. Good imagination bro
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  #7  
Old 17-04-2021, 02:11 AM
bignehneh bignehneh is offline
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Re: Divorce of Vietnam Girl

Best is not to get involved in your friend’s problem. 清官难断家务事。 Every family has their own issues and they should resolve on their own.

From what I read

(1) presume got kids from ex wife
(2) then another small kid from current marriage
(3) and many extended members living with him.
(4) 1 property as asset (quite normal for everyone)
(5) got thick wallet like powerful cpf, cash and stocks?

Better don’t rock the boat la. Quite dangerous. May lost everything.
  #8  
Old 17-04-2021, 03:33 PM
NoFearSg NoFearSg is offline
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Re: Divorce of Vietnam Girl

Tell ur friend, be a man. The girl all the way married here, in hope of better lives. Now what she got? Of course, she will take care of her family back home first cos ur friend can’t work to provide for her and her family back home.

Tell ur friend don’t wear a high hat if he don’t have high head
  #9  
Old 18-04-2021, 03:29 AM
Bullshitlar Bullshitlar is offline
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Re: Divorce of Vietnam Girl

Quote:
Originally Posted by NoFearSg View Post
Tell ur friend, be a man. The girl all the way married here, in hope of better lives. Now what she got? Of course, she will take care of her family back home first cos ur friend can’t work to provide for her and her family back home.

Tell ur friend don’t wear a high hat if he don’t have high head
Agreed, husband can change but her own side of her family is forever same.
Ask yourself this also, u priority is own family or inlaw family first?

About the own kid she bochap nobody should comment. Only her kid can comment because we dont have 100% of the story
  #10  
Old 18-04-2021, 07:14 AM
bignehneh bignehneh is offline
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Re: Divorce of Vietnam Girl

In some cases, the woman expect you to raise her village. So you really must be very careful when you choose ur wife. Don’t let small head think instead of big head. Shot gun is another cock move because all should wear condom in the first place lo.

Some ppl approach girls like they have the wealth to raise her village. After that, the girl will enticed them and then try to raw and have ur kid. After which they know you are trap. After marriage, the woman realised things are not as rosy. Then things starts to happen. The background of the woman also very important.

If the woman is an ex ktv or masseur, even if you earn $20k a month, also may not be enough. She can earn $160 per pop with 1 bj and FJ. Imagine how much she can make a month.

If the girl is a normal girl next door, $20k can already live a very good life. Singapore got woman chapter so need to plan else you lose everything one
  #11  
Old 18-04-2021, 11:59 AM
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CumExplorer CumExplorer is offline
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Re: Divorce of Vietnam Girl

Quote:
Originally Posted by funboi View Post
Actually there are various possibilities.

1. TS is asking for himself.
2. TS aim his friend viet wife long time liao.
3. TS find his viet wife sian already wana divorce without lose money.
4. TS really care for his friend.
5. TS is gay and love his friend. 5555

Sadly, this could be another tragic vietnam girl drama She could be living a hard life in sg cuz her husband ill-treated her since day 1.
Ooooo interesting
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  #12  
Old 18-04-2021, 12:01 PM
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Re: Divorce of Vietnam Girl

Quote:
Originally Posted by NoFearSg View Post
Tell ur friend, be a man. The girl all the way married here, in hope of better lives. Now what she got? Of course, she will take care of her family back home first cos ur friend can’t work to provide for her and her family back home.

Tell ur friend don’t wear a high hat if he don’t have high head
agree bro, up you
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  #13  
Old 18-04-2021, 01:36 PM
ziwan ziwan is offline
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Re: Divorce of Vietnam Girl

I am trying with this agent, safer if u can get a wife with a good agent.

https://mothership.sg/2021/04/vietna...iPtLPUKdhzEH00
  #14  
Old 21-04-2021, 11:23 AM
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Re: Divorce of Vietnam Girl

Quote:
Originally Posted by Janee View Post
Hi, had something on my heart.

my friend got married to a VN girl about 10 years back. Shotgun wedding, so now the kid is about 10 years old. Good kid, but seems a bit neglected by the mother, and the mother doesn't engage with maintenance of the household.

The VN girl doesn't give a fuck about his family, just living there to earn money and spend on makeup, clothes, surgery etc. Stays out late at night, drinks, making money for her family back home.

And my friend just living on and on, gave up on it.

He doesn't really love her, he just loves the kid. He owns the house (his only asset) and retired. He also has two (much older) kids, who live in the same house, and some other extended family members there too.

Weighing heavily on me bc I'm worried for my friend and the kid as well as his family.

I don't know how to convince my friend he should go for divorce, and what are the consequences and implications on his housing situation etc, how he can win the kid (if the mother decides to use him as a shield etc).

Looking for any bros with previous experience in this... how the courts will treat such a marriage, and how to show my friend this raw deal he's getting.
I will say the best advice is for your friend to consult a lawyer discreetly. Your friend should find out from the lawyer how best to prove that during the entire marriage, the wife:
- Did not contribute to the marriage, be it financially, physically (by caring the husband, in-laws, step children etc).
- The wife has means of surviving on her own after the divorce.

The truth is your friend's situation is a little sticky. Yes if she has affairs outside, your friend can divorce her, but her claim of maintenance is another matter entirely.

To protect your friend, the most important thing is to keep his child's passport so his wife cannot take the child away and use it as a bargaining chip. Also your friend should empty their joint account.
  #15  
Old 21-04-2021, 02:30 PM
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Re: Divorce of Vietnam Girl

Quote:
Originally Posted by iluvbreast View Post
I will say the best advice is for your friend to consult a lawyer discreetly. Your friend should find out from the lawyer how best to prove that during the entire marriage, the wife:
- Did not contribute to the marriage, be it financially, physically (by caring the husband, in-laws, step children etc).
- The wife has means of surviving on her own after the divorce.

The truth is your friend's situation is a little sticky. Yes if she has affairs outside, your friend can divorce her, but her claim of maintenance is another matter entirely.

To protect your friend, the most important thing is to keep his child's passport so his wife cannot take the child away and use it as a bargaining chip. Also your friend should empty their joint account.
fully agree, and need to legally protect the interest

SG marriage is governed by the outdated shitty charter, need new govement to reshape it
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