Quote:
Originally Posted by alleycat
after birth of my 2nd kid in 2016, suddenly wife doesnt want sex anymore. Its like a switch went off. I faced countless rejections. Not even cuddles in bed anymore. Previously, she'd would want sex a lot.
we had a huge argument over the deadbedroom situation sometime back, nearly led to a divorce. One of her remarks was "I only wanted sex to have kids". Man, that truly hurt.
Since 2016 till now, we only had sex total of 6 times. That's like once a year of deadfish 'obligatory' sex.
I struggled with this a lot previously. Always fantasized that me n wifey could go back to our great fucks when we were dating/early marriage. Then i slowly thought over and realised its not worth killing myself over this. (yes i had depression and suicide tendencies). I have 2 beautiful daughters who really love me, and for that I'm really grateful.
I changed my mindset. Decided to not let the sex issue get better of me. I decided to be a happier husband and dad. Now I go GL if I cannot supress the urge (which on average once every 4 months).
And this lifestyle kind of works for now. Me n wifey are actually happier with each other (of cos she doesnt know my side hobby), probably because i no longer pressure her into sex. We still hold hands going out, still have our playful banter, just zero sex or intimate cuddles. Basically a married room mate. Kids are happy to see us happy too. One day, as I get older, my libido will slowly die off too and that'll be the end of my GL/FL seeking days.
When i was a teenager and single, I despised men who cheated. Always thought that men should always be faithful to their wives. As I grew, and now in my mid forties, I realised that life isnt all that black and white. Its only going through actual experience and long term struggles that I understood this.
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Just happened to read this, and felt I had to respond too. Bro, you are not alone. My wife started peri-menopause and like your wife, doesn’t want sex or even cuddles or hugs any more. Like you I struggled with this a lot and was hoping it would be temporary and we would go back to our hot sex days. She still has a killer slim body, long legged and tanned with super firm ass, but she doesn’t want sex any more no matter how hard I try to persuade her. It’s super frustrating as she has a much better body and is far better in sex than any FL or escort. But all that is in the past and I feel very agitated sometimes sleeping next to her now knowing I can’t have her body anymore. I’m tempted to seek my release outside but nothing compares to the killer bod and sex my wife was able to give me. It’s like a consolation prize whenever I visit an FL outside.